Stabbing in Pensylvania School

Again, we hear of violence in a public place in America. This time, a 16-year-old high school boy stabbed 19 students and at least one other person at a Pennsylvania high school. It’s another case, in a series of cases, where people have been senselessly attacked just for being present in the wrong place at the wrong time, while doing what they had every right to be doing. These kinds of senseless attacks seem to be more frequent lately. Perhaps the big one that kicked it all off was the shooting at Columbine several years ago. That was a shock then, but now it almost seems commonplace.

There are a couple of things we can learn from this latest attack. One thing that we can learn and perhaps settle once and for all is that it isn’t guns that kill people. This was a case of kitchen knives used to attack students, causing serious injuries and could have caused death. We could have learned this lesson back in 2001 when thousands died, not because of guns, but passenger airplanes. It is always people that carry out this kind of senseless violence.

The other thing we can learn from this is the obvious: we have problems in America. Are people the problem, though? We can’t very well ban people. Individual people aren’t even the problem as much as cultural forces that lead people to carry out such acts. This doesn’t relieve individuals from their own responsibility. But when things like this start growing in number, we must acknowledge there are other factors in addition to the individual.

Some might be tempted to blame mental illness, but in most cases of mental illness, people don’t go to these extremes. Could it be drugs or alcohol? Drugs and alcohol have contributed to violence, but again they are not the key factors that lead individuals to this kind of violence. Generally, people don’t just invent violent acts like this, even with mental disorders or when impaired by substances. For the most part, it is sufficient exposure to the idea of violence that makes this sort of thing possible. That is when mental disorders or chemical impairments can amplify the violence already seeded in the mind. Even excessive stress or other emotional challenges may amplify the violence previously sown in the mind.

It seems obvious where some of these seeds of violence can come from. We live in a time when violence on the screen is glamorized, earning millions for producers and actors—they make their money by feeding us violence. Another source of seeds of violence is the free press, which always does its “duty” to let us know about every horrific act that takes place in our country and the world. Again, shocking news makes money. Certainly, we can’t exclude violence simulated in video games or recounted in certain types of music—again for the sake of money. Parents who don’t intervene in their children’s exposure to all of the above also contribute to the problem. Children don’t always have the maturity to avoid what is harmful.

Some parents and others seem to believe that parents have no right to interfere with a child’s access to media or other influences. But limiting children’s exposure to the vile influences that exist in our culture isn’t a crime—it’s essential to help children grow with healthy attitudes. It’s a parent’s job to protect their children from physical, mental, emotional, spiritual, and moral harm. Parents must keep an eye on what sorts of influences sway their children toward unhealthy choices and take steps to minimize those influences. Obvious improper influences should be shunned automatically.

While parents have the most direct obligation to protect their children, other individuals and organizations must accept the responsibility to avoid doing anything that is likely to harm children or influence them in a negative way. In cases of doubt, we should always err on the side of caution and avoid something that a portion of people believes is harmful.

We must always remember: the harm we do to children is harm we do to our own culture and to our nation.

Say "No" to Suicide

Why does a young girl have to die, taking her own life? She was only 19, my daughter’s friend. I don’t know much about the reasons why. Perhaps now she no longer feels whatever hurts and suffering may have led to this. But what did she unknowingly give up in life? There’s a future that will never be written. As well, there will always be an empty place in the lives of her family and friends.

But this isn’t just an individual problem, not just one person who lost hope. This is a societal problem. According to the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention (AFSP) web site, in 2010 there were 38,364 reported deaths by suicide in the U.S. If that number isn’t high enough to warrant our attention, the web site also says that 464,995 people that same year visited a hospital for self-inflicted injuries, many of which were attempts at suicide. Suicide.org reports the rate of attempted suicides for 2001 as approximately 750,000 per year. The site further says that an estimated 5 million people in the U.S. have attempted suicide (as of 2001).

Many risk factors and causes have been given for suicide. Among them is mental illness. AFSP’s web site says mental illness is one of the most frequently cited risk factors. But they also point out that most “people with mental disorders … do not engage in suicidal behavior.” It’s not just a case of mental illness causing the problem. The site also lists environmental factors that increase suicide risk for those who have risk factors. Among these are, “Prolonged stress due to adversities such as … serious relationship conflict, harassment or bullying.” Among protective factors that lower the risk of suicide are, “Positive connections to family, peers, community, and social institutions such as marriage and religion that foster resilience.” It is clear from these points that associations and connections with people can contribute to or diminish a person’s well being.

In the book, “How Full is Your Bucket?” the authors, Tom Rath and Donald O. Clifton, introduce the subject of their book by describing the  results of a case study of American soldiers detained in a POW camp in North Korea, during the Korean War. Although the reported rates of physical torture and abuse were much lower than in other POW camps, the death rate among these Americans was quite high. American deaths in North Korean camps were as high as 38%, “the highest POW death rate in U.S. military history.” The chapter then reveals how this happened: the captors systematically attempted to “’deny the men the emotional support that comes from interpersonal relationships.’”

They used four tactics that tore down the soldiers’ will to live. First, they encouraged the soldiers to inform on their fellow soldiers in exchange for small gifts or favors. The captors didn’t punish anyone as a result. They were only interested in breaking the bonds between the men. Second, they would gather the soldiers together and have “group discussions” where each soldier was to tell in front of the other soldiers all the bad things he had done and all the good things he could have done, but didn’t. This undermined goodwill between soldiers as well as self-esteem. Third, they slowly attempted to undermine the soldiers’ allegiance to their leaders. And fourth, the captors withheld all incoming mail with positive news, encouraging words, etc. while readily passing on any mail with hurtful news, such as a death in the family, news of a spouse giving up on waiting for the soldier’s return and remarrying.

Clearly, this case gives strong evidence of the power of human interaction. We need each other. We can’t just unthinkingly be harsh or rude, condemning or ridiculing, without some negative consequence to individuals and society. We can’t legitimately say, “that’s your problem.” We all have a moral duty to be kind to others, to be respectful, to help out, to love people. No matter who a person is, no matter what they have done wrong, all people deserve to be treated with dignity, as someone who matters. Even simple things like greeting or smiling at someone can express caring and concern—the ingredients of love for people. Loving people can be displayed through a lot of different attitudes and actions. Sometimes, we may not be aware of how far we are from loving people. 

Perhaps it is a good idea to evaluate our own lives to discover how we may be contributing to the gradual destruction of another human being. Here are a few questions to start the process:

-          - Are we pushing our children too hard to achieve some ideal that only exists in our minds? 

      - Do we tolerate others’ weaknesses or condemn weak people?

-          - What about subordinates at work? Do we recognize that each employee deals with different challenges, or do we drive them to just get the job done like their coworkers?

-         - Do we threaten or demean people, and make them feel like nothing?

-          - Do we attempt to define people’s worth by how much money they make?

-          - Do we look down on people because their work seems beneath us?

-          - Do we gossip and back-stab?

-          - Are we road hogs or courteous drivers?

-          - Do we ignore people who want or need our attention?

-          - Do we forgive those who hurt us or hold an endless grudge?

-          - Do we apologize when we’ve hurt someone else or just figure they’ll forget?

-          - Do we pass by the beggar because “he messed up his own life”?

-          - Do we remember that life is hard for all of us and we all need other people’s help, not condemnation?

-          - Do our words and actions build people up or tear them down?

Sometimes people ask why God doesn’t stop all the things that hurt people. A better question might be, “why don’t we?” Our creator has put in our hands many resources to make our world better. Instead of squandering our lives attempting to prove that there is no creator, perhaps we should take the time to really understand what he has given us. For example, our creator has given us holy books containing his wisdom. The Bible, for example, tells us that one of the greatest commandments from God is to “love your neighbor as yourself.” We could take this idea and apply it or we can choose to complain and say, “It’s just a mythical book, so why believe it?”

This life is about people—not just “me,” but “us.” The question for each of us is, will we make the world a better place with each human interaction, or will we contribute to its demise?